


Lifeless

by xrosepetalsx



Category: Super Junior
Genre: Altered Mental States, Angst, Band Fic, Dark, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-16
Updated: 2013-10-16
Packaged: 2017-12-29 15:00:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1006772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xrosepetalsx/pseuds/xrosepetalsx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I hate you Jongwoon, I hate you so fucking much. You’ve turned us all into monsters…</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lifeless

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted at LJ. Archived here.
> 
> LJ Version [here](http://insanityplays.livejournal.com/4285.html)

It was almost like Ryeowook was the only one who noticed what Yesung was doing to Kyuhyun; no one else saw what he was seeing. There was no one but himself who looked on in despair as Yesung destroyed who Kyuhyun was, destroyed every aspect of his being; there was no one but himself who felt like his heart was being ripped out of his chest.

He just wanted to scream, and often times he did…mentally; he just wanted to shake Kyuhyun’s shoulders and say _Fight back, godamn you, fight back!_ with tears running down his cheeks.

_What’s happening to you? Why are you like this…_

His dreams were haunted by the image of Kyuhyun’s pale, gaunt face, so lifeless and drained of blood. He looked cold, indifferent; the remnants of who he once was could still be seen in his face, and perhaps that’s what fooled everyone else – he still talked like himself, all snark and non-caring attitude, still had that smirk curving his lips – but if you looked in his eyes, there was nothing but broken despair.

He wasn’t Kyuhyun anymore, he was a doll. Yesung’s plaything. Nothing but easily maneuvered cloth arms, legs, body – where was the boy who only did what _he_ wanted to do, and not what ever Yesung asked him to do?

Again, maybe that’s what fooled them all, though Ryeowook cut through the layers of deceit with ease, like a knife through butter – Kyuhyun still refused to do anything for anybody…except Yesung; which wasn’t strange in a relationship…except for the fact that it was Kyuhyun.

Sometimes, Ryeowook would glance over and see that one particular look on Kyuhyun’s face that would break his heart; that look that wasn’t even a pretense.

It was glassy, dazed eyes, and slack mouth. It was heavy breathing and trembling extremities. It was fear, it was sweat, it was confusion. It was the look of someone who was losing themselves.

_You’re killing him! God Damn it, Yesung, look at him!_ Ryeowook would scream, all harsh breathing and scrunched up eyes, attempting to prevent the tears that threatened to fall. _He’s not even Kyuhyun anymore, I don’t know_ what _he is! You’ve created a fucking_ monster _Yesung, what have you done!?_

Yesung never listened, not even when the hot tears spilled and Ryeowook’s breathing got erratic; not even when Ryeowook begged him to stop, begged him to let him go.

_What, so you can have him?_ Yesung would laugh. _Do you really thing you would be better for him Ryeowook? He’d die under your hand just as quickly as he’s dying under mine. He was never meant to belong to someone – he was supposed to be free._

_Then let him free._

_I could never. He is mine._ His voice would be angry, and would hold a challenge that never ceased to make Ryeowook recoil. He could see so easily how Kyuhyun had lost himself to Yesung – the challenge would have been something Kyuhyun would never have backed down from, the voice disarming and so ready to engulf your soul the moment you let your guard down.

In reality, it didn’t matter how much Ryeowook loved Kyuhyun, because he would never get him back from Yesung. It was far, far too late, and if he pushed too hard, he feared one day, he would end up just like Kyuhyun.

Maybe it made Ryeowook a monster as well, but he couldn’t give himself up for Kyuhyun. He could never give himself up for anyone.

_I hate you Jongwoon, I hate you so fucking much. You’ve turned us all into monsters…_ Every time he confronted Yesung, he felt his heart break just a little more, felt his will crumple slowly, and he knew, at one point, it would turn to dust and he would be in the hands of Yesung, a puppet as useless as Kyuhyun.

He knew he should give up, but he always came back. Watching Kyuhyun die little by little, knowing one day he would be totally broken, forced him to come back, even when he knew giving up would mean keeping his own sanity.

He knew, somewhere in the back of his mind, that what he was doing was stupid, and he feared one day it would be too late, and he would lose himself just as surely as Kyuhyun had. But what could he do? He loved him.


End file.
